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Roasted Concrete in the house![/caption]Later in the day we were talking about the crummy thing people do in the world. The topic turned to people who steal dogs from cars. If anyone actually committed this terrible crime they would have an automatic ticket to hell.
I thought that was the funniest thing in the world and we brainstormed all the things that would warrent an automatic ticket to hell. I really like to write little songs that go with the things I am talking about. Pretty soon I started singing this little ditty after each instant we came up with. I then decided that Automatic Ticket to Hell would be Roasted Concrete's first single.
Below are a list of things I have come up with that would give a person an Automatic Ticket to Hell. After each of these you can play the video again and again or just sing your own version.
Please note that I do not actually think these people need to go to Hell. I can not decide that. I am not God. Really it is just a list of things that make a person a jerk or annoy me.
- Stealing a dog from a car.
- Anyone who does not like Penny
- Telling someone in a wheelchair that you will race them.
- Keeping your children out past 10 pm in Vegas.
- Cutting in and out of traffic to gain a minute on your arrival time.
- Posting a photo of yourself on your blog or Instagram that you look great in but your friends look terrible in.
- Hearing that someone is not there for a reservation and saying it you.
- Talking to someone on speakerphone in a public restroom.
- Thumping the beats in your car so hard you cause an earthquake.
- Having a conversation with me as I am walking into the restroom.
- Hearing me say "hi", making eye contact with me, and walking away.
- Making me ask for more of anything at Chipotle.
- The Chipotle worker who forgets to give me the vinegarette I asked for.
- When the person in front of me has to read the menu at Subway, they have sandwiches with meat, just choose one.
- When the person in front of me has to get sandwiches for the whole office and won't let me go before them.
So we need your help to make this song a total hit. What would you add to the automatic ticket to hell list?
Hahah this is great!!!
ReplyDeletehahah, these are great! I love the one about cutting in and out of traffic. That's so true around here...or they race off after passing you to end up sitting at a red light. I always want to give a little wave at them when I pull up.
ReplyDeletedamn you forgetful chipotle worker! also that song is going to be a hit single for sure!
ReplyDeletehahahah - total hit. Let's get you guys an agent. (and wait- someone really had someone else on speaker phone in the restroom? no. just no.)
ReplyDeleteRight? I want to have like a sign that says "Your poor driving choices, didn't get you very far." and then I would get shot because I live in LA
ReplyDeleteThanks! I have had it stuck in my head all day, you will find so many things that would get someone an automatic ticket to hell if you look for it.
ReplyDeleteRight! I hate when I open my bag and Mr. amnesia forgot it again! And thank for your support, I hope you can make it to our album release party
ReplyDeleteYES!!! I want to yell, "Hey this public restroom is filthy!' So the person on the phone would know for sure what their friend was doing.
ReplyDeleteI laughed at "Posting a photo of yourself on your blog or Instagram that you look great in but your friends look terrible in." I'm sure your band would be rockin'!
ReplyDeleteYes if youre ordering for your office be polite hello we all only get 1 hour here LOL I cant watch the video bc im at work...Im going to watch it tonight.
ReplyDeleteThat last one! That happens to me at Starbucks. I had this one guy order like 8 coffees. I was late to work thanks to him.
ReplyDeleteYou're like a combination of Fergie and Jesus!
ReplyDeleteHitting on single girls when you are a married man, peeing in a bottle and leaving it on the street, and hiring a stripper.
ReplyDeleteOne time I went to Subway and ended up behind a family that had never been there; how is this possible I don't know. But it was miserable. I have no idea why they wouldn't let me go in front of them since it took them at least 10 minutes to figure out the menu and decide what they want!! So annoying.
ReplyDeletehahaha! this is hilarious, love it.
ReplyDeleteLMAO! This is going to be stuck in my head now. I agree with all of these statements!
ReplyDeleteOh gosh! that video is silly. Subway is the source of my eternal angst.
ReplyDeleteIt is so true! I happened to read a friend's blog and she did that to a friend of ours. I felt very bad for her.
ReplyDeleteoh yes, I knew I forgot a few :)
ReplyDeleteHighest compliment I have ever received.
ReplyDeleteRight? I feel like everyone should just go and get their own food, or at least only get two orders.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Jenn!
ReplyDeleteHow does that even happen? Bread, cheese, meat, veggies, what is so hard.
ReplyDeleteIt has been in my head for like three days. I almost sang it while I was teaching.
ReplyDeleteThis post was funny! Stealing a dog from a car is pretty terrible, but it reminded of something that I totally disagree with. There were these people that would always come into the movies and they would watch THREE movies a day a couple of times a week, which would have been fine except for the fact that they left their dog in the car THE WHOLE TIME. They actually got hate notes left on their car from other customers. It is so not cool to do that ever, let alone on a hot summer's day.
ReplyDeleteHa! Having to ask for more at Chipolte, YES!
ReplyDeleteRight? Why can't they just fill the bowl?
ReplyDeleteI thought about putting "People who leave their dog in a car for more than a few minutes. Especially during summer." It is heartbreaking. PETA would have been on my speed dial for those crazy movie goers.
ReplyDelete[…] the week and decided to do it on Friday because it involves a list and I had a list post on Friday last week, and it seemed like a noble tradition to […]
ReplyDeleteNot telling me how you take your coffee .... And wondering for half a minute if you will take ice with your coke .... Not a life time decision people and I am guessing not the first time you make that decision, so why so long to answer? I am a flight attendant, I have patience, but 300 hesitant passengers requires something I don't have ...
ReplyDeletePS I am definitely going to join your Friday list. Great idea!
ReplyDeleteHaha! I can nobly image what that is like dealing with the public on a plane! glad you will be joining the link up!
ReplyDelete