Single Girl True Life Confessions

This weekend I had the opportunity to go to the Breaking Bad Arts Gala at the Munchkin Mansion.

[caption id="attachment_1059" align="aligncenter" width="620"] As I said on instagram: yes, I clean up good. No, I do not know how I am single either.[/caption]

That really was not what it was called, but it was too hard to remember to say the Bricolage Arts Gala at the Muckenthaler Mansion.  On a side note I am going to host a Breaking Bad Art Gala at the Munchkin Mansion next month.  Look for your invite in the mail. Speaking of mail I am sending out Penny's post cards this week!  Keep your eyes peeled.

Despite the fanciness of this even what it really was was a fancy talent show for the arts students at the school I work at.  I was very impressed with many of the students that were there and the artistic and creative ability they possess.  My favorite were the hip hop dancing kindergartners.  I WILL be making my future children be hip hop dancers.

May had one of her art pieces featured and she sat with me and her friends while we laughted our way through the 30 minute long Broadway medley of songs I had never heard of.  It was a great night all around.

[caption id="attachment_1056" align="aligncenter" width="620"] May is quite the artist![/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1057" align="aligncenter" width="620"] Cute photo with the girl![/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1058" align="aligncenter" width="620"] This is her silly face. Child please![/caption]

After the gala I had to walk to my car in high heels, at 10 o'clock at night, in the dark, freezing my long legs off,  by myself.

I usually do not complain or care that I am a single lady just livin' life carrying on and what have you, but there are times it would be nice for the world to make some allowances for us single ladies, if you know what I mean.  Below is my list of single lady perks I would like to see adopted in the world as soon as possible.

Single Lady Parking Spaces
I think it is high time the close to the door spaces stop being hogged by the elderly and the handicapped.  Looking as good as I did Friday night and walking alone to my car in a dark neighborhood should not be happening the world. Am I right ladies?

You Are Fabulous Gift Registry
I love all my friends that have gotten married or are getting married soon. Love them.  I also love being in their weddings or going to their weddings to show my support of their nuptials.  I even love buying them things for the home they are going to be making together.

I like to think they think of me every time they use the coffee mugs I bought or sleep on the sheets I bought them (Gross.  I actually never buy anything for the bedroom that happens to be on a registry). But what about me?  I mean just because I am not getting married anytime soon does not mean I couldn't use a Kitchen Aid or  Ninja Blender?  Can we petition Pinterest, they are in charge of all weddings now right, and come up with a single girls gift registry? Perhaps for her 30th birthday which is coming up in November? hmmm?

Moving Day Boyfriend
I hate moving!  I was all OK with it when I was fresh out of college.  I would move a bed up three flights of stairs and not bat an eyelash.  Now, I can think of nothing worse.   The idea of having to lift heavy boxes, hire movers that are creepy men in tank tops, and then get everything in its place is daunting.  I once had a boyfriend when I had to move and let me tell you it was nice, he even had a truck.  I have considered finding boys on Match.com a month or so before I move again just so I could have some extra muscle.

Furniture Assembler 
Yes I know I can hire a handyman to do this or heck I could even do it myself.  I actually have built my own furniture,  and that desk only wobbles when you put something on it.  I am telling you I am just not interested in furniture assembly.

Single Girl Security System
When I come home late at night and the house is empty I would love it if I had someone who would walk from room to room and make sure the person I am convinced is going to murder me is not hiding in a closet or a shower.  Yes, I check for myself and I am always uber dramatic; throwing doors open, flicking on the lights, hitting the ground in case I startled the gun man and they shoot.  Not that I want a boyfriend to be shot.  I actually only think about these things when I am home alone.

Dog Taker Outsider
I love my little Penny girl.  I just do not love it when she wakes me up at 4 in the morning and I have to take her outside to potty.  It would be great if when you bought a puppy they provided a person to help shoulder the load if you are single.  I am telling you I could live without seeing as much puppy poop as I have in my short life.

Junk Food Eater
Occasionally I will eat some junk food, OK I really would eat it every day if I could.  The only problem is that It is just me and a bag of Cooler Ranch Doritos   If will power was actually a thing this situation would not be a problem.  I have been known to eat a lot of junk food, I actually made myself sick this weekend because I ate too many cookies.  It would be great if there was another person around to eat some of the junk when I break down and run to Target in the middle of the night.

What is something you wish was a thing that would make your life easier? Single or married I am sure we all have some ideas.