There's Always Chinese Hitler

Hey Oh!  On Tuesday I shared some of my favorite pick up lines that I have heard in my life.  I promised I would tell you which of these fine fellas I actually went on a date with and i am ready to break it down for ya.  Before I do though please do not judge me too harshly!  Also you will see that the bar is set pretty low so if you are a mildly interesting fella who isn't too creepy there is probably hope for you.

- I was just sitting here drinking alone and wanted to know if you wanted to get coffee next week.

To be fair I did go out with this guy, but we just finished the hardest class and final ever.  I can understand drinking alone, that one time. 

- So wanna get dinner at Denny’s?

College days man.  Denny's was quite the romantic spot between the ages of 14 - 20. 

- Wanna come over and watch Indiana Jones tonight?

No I didn't want to come over and watch Indiana Jones, but I did and we dated for a month.  Then his mom made me chicken when I was a vegetarian and we broke up. 

- Have you ever been to the three dollar theater?

We didn't go to the three dollar theater.  We went to Baja Fresh instead.  I ordered nachos.  He never asked me out again. 

- Can I come over to your house and watch the latest episode of The Office?  I will bring cup of noodles for a snack.

So maybe I had no idea the cup of noodles were part of the deal.  He showed up to my house in jammies and a cup of noodles for each of us.  Then I ate it and he offered to get me more because "I have tons of these in the trunk of my car."

- I am training to become an ultimate fighting champion.  My cage name is Prince Of Pain.

It's true I dated the Prince Of Pain, POP.  Then he married one of my best friends.  It's the circle of love. 

As I look back on all these winning moments in my life I could lose hope.  However, when things get tough I remember that Chinese Hitler sent me the following email earlier this school year and apparently I have quite the fan base for 24 year old Chinese fascists.

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From:wor-god (Hitler)
Date: Fri, Nov 22, 2013 at 9:56 PM
Subject: Hello, pretty girl, I want to be friends with you
To: erica jacquline

You must think of how I get your e-mail, and one of my friends in the U.S. you go to school, he let me see your picture, I think you're beautiful, I love you, so I want to my friend your mailbox and decided to become friends with you, I am a Chinese, I am 24 years old, if you prefer, we can continue to further develop our relationship.

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I just copied and pasted this from my email account word for word.  You can not make stuff like this up.  Also I was really scared for like four months and just recently thought it was funny and I should share it with you. 

 

[caption id="attachment_1701" align="aligncenter" width="600"] None of these people are Chinese Hitler. They are just friends from work that laughed at the Chinese Hitler email.[/caption]